So how are you? And where are you know?

Little did you know, tears soaks my pillow case wet every night.
Little did I know, memories in the past still havent't been forgotten.

So where are you know? May you come out of my dreams?
So how are you now? Do pass me a message, telling me you are alright

We met, but we didn't say hi
We pretend, we don't know each other
We used to smile, to talk
But now, we seems don't talk anymore

I used to find you, whenever i want
You were always there, for me
Even you don't have broad shoulders, you have warm heart, and a smile that makes me forget about eveything, leaving just me and you
But now, i learnt to be there all my myself
i cry on my own shoulders, i smile in front of my reflection
perhaps, it's ok without you here. Perhaps

So where are you know?
So how are you know?

Knowing that without you, everything turns silence
Knowing that without you, heart pumps slower than i expected
Knowing that without you, motivation doesn't exist
Knowing that only with you, colour appears in my world :)

It's ok , it's ok.
Nevermind, nevermind.
I'm still the one who stands strong
I'm ok, I'm really ok.
Sorry for everything, please keep going
Don't turn back.
Even u did so, i will always smile and say: I'm ok :)

Not your fault, is me being immature.
Not your fault, it's just fate playing april fool
Not your fault it's me being ignorance

Grab the girl you meet next
Don't let the chance passed by
Cause you never know when will the wind stop by
I will be moving on soon
don't worry , i will stay strong:)

So where are you know?
So how are you now?

You are good enough :)

We always feel unconfident, in academic, in sports, literally every other areas.

We compare ourselves to others, hoping to get over them , even just being a little more better than them.

We struggle, because we fear to lose. 

We are pushing ourselves towards the cliff, as we wanna live a so called BETTER life

But, are they worth it?

Since when,we stopped being ourselves?

Since when, we are living under people's expectation?

We cried, because we lose

We depressed, as we failed to reach our goal

We lost hope, because we feel useless 

When will be the time, for us to set free?

When will be the day, for us to jump off the cliff?

When will be? For us to be just ourselves?

Please, stop comparing. It isn't necessary

Please, stop fighting, for grades.

We are here to gain knowledges, not to show how good you are to SCORE WELL IN EXAMS

who agrees more exams are just tests for memories? Me

Stop worrying, stop crying, stop judging.

People who comes close to you just because you are clever and u score well in exams, aren't true friends

They are just a HI-BYE friend 

You don't have to do well just to let people regconise you

You don't have to score well to catch lecture's attention

Indeed, do what you should do , as a student

Love knowledges, appreciate what you choose

Try to love what you are learning right now, lil by lil, even you hate it much

Try not to jealous, try not to envy, cos u can always do better than them

Evn you are far left behind, don't give up

There's still true friends who always there,preparing to lend you a hand

Remember, you are not alone

Grades don't divide people into smart vs stupid groups

We are just students, we learn form mistakes

We learn from basic, and we enjoy what we master 

So stand up, keep going.

Failed once doesn't mean you will fail the entire life

Be determined on what you choose 

Be confidence on what you do

As you are good enough, in your own way :)

be just the way you are :)

Dealing with the University Tak Ada Rehat

  Time flies, too fast indeed. It's now the end of week 3 in utar kampar. Almost the end of week 3 ...and week 5 will be our mid-term test. As what the title mentioned, the university lifestyle right here is really busy. Even u have maximum 5 hours class ONLY a day, u literally stay at school the whole day.

 2.  Well, there are 2 to 3 hours break between classes,but mostly students won't cycle back to their hostel to take a rest or whatever during this period...UNLESS U HAVE A CAR. Or else who will be willing to cycle under the sun for 10 to 15 minutes to housing area and cycle back 10 to 15 minutes to the campus? Just to take a nap between classes?

3.   Moving on to studies...there's nothing called relax or chill dealing with these studies like what u watched in korean drama. Literally u have no rest and those tutorials and waiting-fo-u to-print-notes never come to the end. Those tasks on your timetable are always listed more than 5 , even more ! Time management turns out very important to me right now, totally different mindset compared to high school. Don't ever try to delay yr tasks for days cause u will ended up having more tasks!

 4. Being sociable is quite important in university,since the class is too big, u will take a long long long long long time to get to know all the students in your lecture class,not even all students from your stream. Well, i admit im not initiative to make new friends and i don't know how to make new friends. So having a sociable friend is indeed very important cause she or he will help u alot to make new friends. Thanks to Zheng Marn, im now having a circle of new friends liek Tee, Fishy Rui, Vivian Chee, Shu Min,Winnie, Alicia, Gary , Wen Xiang , Nelson and etc( who some of them are literally crazy and we always ended up laughing so hard). And all my image gone ...in week 3 :P

 5. Even study life is busy, still i ended up joining clubs, utar chinese orchestra of course my first choice, but i also joined the so called 24节令鼓,following my friend hahahahah. These clubs are having practices at night (7.30pm to 10 pm) and (6pm to 8pm)... life even more busy...but who cares? enjoy utar life, yolo :D

 6.  For dining, the frequent asked question is: "where to eat today arh?" No doubt, kampar is a place loaded with restaurants, mamaks, kopitiams. Even utar campus has more than 3 canteen. If u lazy to go out, call delivery la, lots of choice for u to choose. But mainly the food costs in kampar is higher than ipoh. Even in canteen,  economic rice can cost u rm5.50 and above. On Wednesday, we have pasar malam,but believe it or not. Wednesday is the day which raining comes visit, and im still wondering why the pasar malam don;t wanna change day and insist on Wednesday lol.

  Overall, even utar's life is realy really busy like a bee. Still i didn't regret choosing utar even it was not my first university choice ( my first choice is UCSI) haha.Utar teaches u things and u may not learn form other places Utar, My choice :D
 

穿不下的衣服，塞不进的鞋子

  一件衣服再漂亮，不代表你能把它穿得好看
    一件衣服再漂亮，不代表你能有足够的钱把它买下
      一件衣服再漂亮，不代表你一定穿得下。

      如同感情，你执著的认为它会是你一生中最好的缘分
       但时间证明，你没有那个能力去好好守护这段缘分
         但结果证明，这段缘分即使再美好，它依然不属于你


就算你有多么的喜欢，不属于你终究不属于你
  穿不下的衣服你硬要穿只会让别人笑话
     塞不进的鞋子你硬要穿只会让你更辛苦
        但放弃自己喜欢的一切，值得吗？

                               

20 Facts About Me :D

1. born in 9/4/1998 and now im officially 18, legal age, mature age( i think it's mature right? )

2. Aries (please note that im an very silly typical Aries...u will know it later :P)

3.Food is life,no food no life, cannot survive...and i eat alot,alot and ALOT like a man hahah

4.short like 157cm( 5 feet tall ) and thick...erm hmmm( weight is super a secret )

5.love learning academic new things( kinda dump into the knowladge ocean) but get bored fast ahahah.

6.always physically awake but mentally asleep( especially in class)

7.love sport...but sometimes lose energy and don't wanna workout AT ALL ( this explain im always FAILED to lose weight)

8.hyperactive with no reason at all( and it always happens after i eating too much sugary stuffs ... so please stop me eating too much of that if u don't wanna me get into triuble in a library XD)

9.love fruit smootiessssss and greens ( i think that's the only good fact of me haha)

10.don't know how to make friends initiatively but if we get close i will have no image in front of u at all...but do come to know me and make friends im just abit shy AT FIRST :P

11.stubborn and my mum always scold me for that haha :P 

12.cherish friendship very much ( didn't forget any of my old friends even i didn't contact them often since i mentioned im SHY... erm sometimes only haha)

13. TPG's ( the pig girl ) 

TPGs

14.studied in Ave Maria Convent Ipoh ( year 2006 - 2015) , will be an official utarian soon !

15. sleep in class ( always ) zzz

16.there's a person i like since standard one, until now and till the end of my life. ( Seriously no joking, why am i able to crush on him so long ya?)

17. always try to answering in class (if not i 100% sure fall asleep), and that's the fun part for me in class ! haha

18. am a weirdo . but if i go serious in something, i will be sibeh serious.( eg: doing add maths or focusing on something) haha

19. playful...literally dare to try anything new and fun... a good example is the haunted housie( im so scared of ghost but still i go...for fun!)

20.used to suffered from eating disorders ( anorexia and bulimia) * will be touching on that in future blog updates and glad to say that i have 90% recovered and im still trying my best to get better :)


#hope u guys reading this blog, don't mind about my eating disorder background, cos like i said, im on the way of recovery and almost there:D

What I Eat In a Day? #Random

  It just kind of random for me to write this kind of blog, and at first i decided to write it in mandarin but...im a lazy kiddo :)

  My eating lifestyle is all about clean eating, not 100 % clean of course, i always crave for unhealthy stuffs , especially those high sugar high calories one like ice cream, cookies, cakes , fried noodles...erm...lets not talk about them anymore beacuse im starving for keep recalling those tasty treats :P

  Not only clean eating, im also iifym eating( if it fits your macros) and intermittent fasting as well as intuitive eating,go check if u don't know what there are.In the past two yeaers for struggling in the DIET ocean, i realised thta i can't restrict myself too much cos when i did so, restricting myself for not eating this and that,the more i restrict, i more i want foods, and this will lead me to binge eating. This explains why i can't lose weight but gain even more weight.....lol

  Therefore,im no longer eating low carb or low fat or zero carb blablabla.......yes by eating low carb does help people lose weight,or should i call water weight...why people who under low carb diet lose weights fast , but sorry i can't follow this freaking diet for my whole life . it doesn't mean this diet is the best and i have to take this diet...YOLO,it's all about yolo,u know? u know?!

  okay, sorry for saying too much errhmmm haha 

11.00am

firstly i start of my day with bunch of fruits, usually i blend them together to make a cold smootie, cos it is so refreshing :)

and this is the product , looks good right? oh and i have added some cinnamon, lemon and ginger in it to give it a kick :P

1pm

                                                 stir fry green beans, bak choy with tofu

6pm

                                              soymilk blended with ginger and cinnamon 

7.30pm

                 stir fry cabbage , bellpepper,beans, red cabbage ,carrot, onion and tofu :)

  And that's all what in eat in a day, not everyday. kind of boring but at least there are guilt free hehe. and i declare, not EVERYDAY cos YOLO~~~

  Have a great day!

4月3号

之前说过了超级补习班回忆（或是和闺蜜的回忆），现在来说说超级的颁奖典礼。没错，就是今天哈哈。颁奖典礼是超级的特色之一，唯一让我们遗憾的是，这是我们最后一次参加了。。。

报到时间是2.30pm，但我们应该在12.00pm就到嘉马广场去彩排的，可是我们没有，偏偏到bo eight去喝茶哈哈哈，任性到极点omo.

柠檬无糖绿茶:)

其实也没什么特别的事情发生，就是我那几个闺蜜笨到上天去了，说穿裙她们真给我傻傻的穿裙哈哈，也顺理成章的成了美美达领奖者。我没穿，就上衣牛仔裤一身轻松哈哈哈。

五缺一:(

牺牲自己变平凡衬托三个小姐，我也太伟大了呗。嘿嘿嘿，你们应该请我喝茶当谢礼，理所当然XD.颁奖典礼进行时我们也没闲着（准确来说是没法静静坐着:P) 。高贝分的嗓子就出现一次，因为我们太high所以喊了一下，前排的人立马回头看我们，好不尴尬。。。随后我们也去喝茶了，在一间叫什么bee的餐厅，实在受不了那刺耳的whistle声，beh tahan hahaha.

然后我发现一件很好笑的事，就是全A生竟被放进banner里！呃。。。好像夸张了点。。。

snapchat :coffeecheah

 最后，以一句很老土的话结束：颁奖典礼顺利落幕，我们各自回家~下次见:D

#ps: 本来写了一饼干桶的信要带来给某人的，可是我忘了所以就。。。算了呗哈哈哈

Throwback超级补习的回忆:D

曾听别人说，与一个人插肩而过，是上辈子的500次对眸所积下的缘分。那么想必我上辈子一定干了不少善事，才能结交到你们这一班好闺蜜。还记得当初我还是一个人的时候，我都不懂得如何交朋友，后来补习才渐渐和你们熟悉起来，后来竟然粘在一块了，分不开了哈哈。两年而已，我们变得无话不谈，无傻事不玩，连超级补习中心的人都怕了我们哈哈哈。在班上，我们绝对是最吵的那个。

丢会

1。那时我被狗追然后被吓哭时，你们竟然在笑！特码的下次见你们一次我就放狗追你们一次。

2。曾经我们一起暗恋补习班上的男生们，如今，却始终只是暗恋。尽管如此，那段美好的回忆还是高中生活的甜蜜回忆。

3。在一个event当中，我们因看了一部很感动的戏而哭红了眼睛，暗黑的教室里有你我的安慰，彼此轻拍对方的肩膀。结束后，还疯狂的和老师们一起喊彼此喜欢的男生，还是说被我们撮合的男生哈哈哈。我不会忘记，场面有多么尴尬:P

4。我们常把对方喜欢的男生拿来开玩笑，努力的撮合对方，搞得彼此面红耳赤哈哈。暗地里说不要再去补习了，却还是惯性的为了见你们而去补习。

5。我们常去的那家yoyo小店，现在还开着呢，还记得我们在那里庆祝了蒋舜林的生日吗？还有，一起去打包薯条回班，搞得全班人都不能专心上课，因为那薯条的香气哈哈哈。

6。我们在班上的笑声，是全补习中心最最最响亮的笑声，当初没有叫老师录起来还真有点可惜。那我们又是什么原因而笑呢？往往是无厘头的笑，真的没有原因。

7。补习楼下无端端多了两只小猫咪，怕猫的熊恩婷，我不会忘记我是怎么把猫咪捉来吓你的哈哈哈，还有蒋舜林，我也没忘记你是怎么怕猫怕成一个样的XD

8。临考前的补习，我们到Bo eight去吃东西，回来时我骗你们我把手机留在那里了。。。你们竟然在上课时偷偷躲到厕所去打我的电话号码，怕我手机被偷（还好我放静音了）回来发现我在骗你们，气得熊恩婷把我电话没收了，回家时竟然把我电话也带回去。。。。

9。话说，补习班的人应该很怕我们，虽然我们是最吵的，可是也是最会抢答的，好不输给班上的精英哈哈哈，答对不少题呢

10。黑天鹅,banana, 琵琶鸭,jagah,烧鸡,jeffery,羊咩咩。。。这些花名，你们还记得吗？

11。还有，我们有一次把Pn.Jiong的女儿吓哭了。。。哈哈哈哈

Ms.Cindy

熊恩婷，还记得addmaths补习时，我一直都和你斗快吗？老实说，那是我最愿意动脑筋的时候，也是脑筋转最快的时候。当然，我也有想偷懒的时候，那时候就假装在做功课，还以为ms.teow不知道，原来她一直都知道哈哈哈哈亏我们还以为我们装得很逼真:P

还有杜颖蔚，叶素君，蒋舜林，缺一不可的我们始终敌不过时间的流逝，我们不可能再一直逗留在17岁的年华，不可能再说聚就聚，不可能再常常见面直到看见对方都觉得腻哈哈。但如果有机会，我还是会和你们再一起装逼，一起丢脸，一起傻，一起干很幼稚很傻逼的事。我不会介意别人的眼光，因为我知道我不是一个人的，永远都不是。我答应，我不会忘记你们，你们也不被允许忘记我哈哈。我会把我们的照片框起来带去宿舍的，想念了就看上几眼。

 时间过得很快很快，我想把它们都停下来，可是我做不到。我们还是得继续向前走，即使有多么的不舍。是你们带给了我欢笑，让我知道世界上不是只有读书和考试，高中生活也可以很精彩，很好玩。如果没有认识到你们，估计我的补习生活真的会很沉闷吧？

蒋舜林的生日

 我不知道，原来让我喜欢的人知道我喜欢他竟然是那么的简单，因为有你们在为我打镇定剂
 ，出糗也不怕，和你们在一起，我已经没有image了哈哈，我不介意，一点也不。因为你们，我从没在高中生活留下任何遗憾，反而保存了很多珍贵的回忆。直到今天，我看到了那补习班的走道，还会不知觉得笑出来。那里，一直都回有我们的影子。

与Mr.Kelvin的合照:)

我不会跟你们说拜拜，只会说再见，因为我一定会和你们再见。就算我们以后各自走上了属于自己的生活轨道，我还是会不断回头，想起我们那段傻逼时光，那班曾经不成熟的我们。。。即使我们分开得再远，地球是圆的，世界是小的，最终我们还是会回来相聚，互相分享旅途的悲伤和欢乐，然后捧腹大笑，这就是我们，不是吗？

                                                 我最爱的TPG，答应我，勿忘我:)